Uganda pt. 1: The Bus Ride from Hell

The bus ride from Hell

For this adventure, the goal was to explore the birding sites of northern Uganda, focusing on the northeast, with a detour to Murchison Falls and Budongo Forest to pick up some species we missed in 2018. I would engage the legendary birding and our dear friend Emmy Gongo (who didn't mind getting away from the house for a while let's just say), and old friend Wilson Tiren, a legendary birder in his own right. Wilson is an expert guide in Kenya, but he has had limited experience unleashing his skills across borders. As the trip financier, I was able to bring him for a "guiding sabbatical" as I called it. We had our covid tests, tickets booked, and route planned out with a very competent driver/guide at the wheel. What could go wrong? 

The decision to take the night bus was one I took to save money. The flights were $150 a pop whereas the bus was around $40 US each. Since I was catering for two, it made sense to opt for the long bus ride. 

I more or less chose the bus company at random, thinking for a second to use Mash Poa, but then remembering a comfortable ride I had with Modern Coast from Kampala to Kigali once, so I went with the later. Well I should have consulted friends because Modern Coast is absolutely the worst. 

It started when I arrived at the office and the bus was nowhere to be seen. I was told it would be 90 minutes late. Once everybody had stuffed their luggage underneath, we left a full 2 hours late. Poor Wilson was waiting for us in Nakuru for quite a while. The ticketing system was a little confusing as all I had to prove that I had two seats was a text receipt with no names attached or actual tickets. The long road to Busia border was fraught with non-stop rumble strips and bumps, due to the road construction. The suspension on the bus was terrible and many of the slide-open windows were quite loose, causing them to vibrate every time we hit a rumble strip. Every time you would nod off to sleep, it was like a machine gun in your ear jolting you awake. The fabric on the seats and headrests was coated in dust and encrusted saliva from who knows how many journeys. The air reeked of armpit stank, and a cockroach scooted across my seat. 

At the Busia border, our troubles were just beginning. After waiting in the slow line, we were asked to present our negative covid test. I duly presented mine, but there was a problem. I needed a 'receipt' apparently (news to me). Well I had not been issued one. "If this is a requirement, why would the clinic not have mentioned it?" I asked. Basically the guy said it was not his problem and I had to figure it out. So I called the clinic and surprisingly somebody picked up the phone (at around 1:00 am) and quickly emailed me a receipt. I brought it over and I was good to go (or so I thought). 

About an hour later after this arduous process started, I was then escorted over to another building, where I was asked to present a "travel waiver" letter. This was the first I'd heard of it. I asked how I'm supposed to get this in the middle of the night, telling them I had checked the Ugandan embassy website very carefully and didn't read anything about this. I was escorted to down a sketchy alley in the middle of the night to an internet café where I got the letter printed from the government website and was told need to pay 1000 bob (about 10 bucks). Then back over the the immigration building to wait in line again and present my documents. I explained that I was a resident and that my card hadn't yet arrived but here is my stamped letter from the government building stating that my work permit had been approved (I had already been working for 4 months at this point). The Kenyan immigration stamped my passport and sent me over to Ugandan immigration. There I was given a huge hassle for not having a "resident stamp" in my passport. Well I told them that if the people over at the immigration building in Nairobi didn't know what they were doing, that was hardly my fault, and that I was told by human resources at my work that this letter would be sufficient. The Ugandan officer had nothing of it and would not pass up a golden opportunity to fleece a foreigner. He took me into his office and flatly said he can't let me into the country. I tried to stay calm but at this point I was very tired and getting very annoyed. I said all I want to do is to visit your beautiful country, I've done all my research and I'm pretty confident I would be allowed to visit, but of course that is not for me to decide, so tell me how I can enter, and I want to do this "by the book". If, as you say, you won't accept my stamped government letter, then can I at least get a tourist visa? 

"It's too late for that" he said. "What do you mean "too late?" I asked. All you need to do is give me a tourist stamp, and I pay 50 bucks. I've done this before." He was so determined to get a bribe that there was nothing I could do. He said he'll need 50 USD in cash, or 5400 shillings. I said I only have 2000 shillings in my wallet. So he told me to go to an ATM. So I went but my card wasn't working. I said how about I give you the 2000, which is all I have, and I can be on my way. He said no. Then I asked how come I pay income tax, just like any foreign worker should, but I don't get any of the rights I'm promised? At this comment he started pretending to get angry (a classic tactic), putting on a show and making me feel as though I should apologize (which I did). I said I apologize, I don't mean any disrespect, I'm just very tired and confused. Your country does a lot to promote its tourism, yet it's so far extremely difficult for me, as a tourist, to enter and I still don't understand why that is. This had been dragging on so I just said look, can I send the 50 bucks to the bus fixer, then he can relay it to you? He said yes, and I got my entry stamp. He had his bribe and I didn't even have the mPESA receipt to prove it. The worst part was that if he'd let me get my tourist visa, my work would have probably reimbursed me. 

Meanwhile, Wilson was having problems of his own. His Covid test clinic had not sent him the results within the promised timeframe, even though it has been well over 24 hours and he had paid about 5000 bob (they gave him half his money back but kept the rest). Several times he had tried to tell me we should just turn back and forget about this Uganda trip because it is cursed.  But I would not have any of it. I had worked too hard to give up this trip, the only thing I had been clinging to these past 4 months of unrelenting work. Somehow, he managed to bribe them 2000 bob to stamp him through. Two hours later, we were back on the bus and across the border. 

I was thinking how if we had taken the plane, none of this corruption would have happened. I had learnt a stark lesson that would be reinforced throughout our trip: that Uganda is a country which only caters to the rich - in terms of not only its tourists but also its citizens. 

We were about 10 km past the border when we finally relaxed. Then, two soldiers hailed the bus driver and boarded the bus to check everybody's negative covid test certificates. "Oh F**K ME..." I muttered. Just when we thought the fleecing was over. We were all the way at the back so we hoped it was just random spot checks, but they systematically checked every single passenger until finally they got to Wilson, the last one at the back. "Just show him your covid vaccine passport and don't say anything else" I said. The soldier was impatient and very serious. "This is not a test certificate" he said. Wilson said "they stamped my passport, they said it was ok." The guard kept saying a bunch of stuff but Wilson stayed quiet. Then the soldier said exactly these words: "You are likely to be sent back." Then he walked to the front of the bus, said something quickly to the conductor, stepped off, and we drove off. 

Nairobi National Park

Grant's Gazelle

Nairobi National Park may be a portion of its former glory, but it is still an epic park. It has faced an onslaught of pressure from the human population over the years. It is nearly impossible to photograph an animal anywhere in the park without having to crop out man-made structures from the background. Historically, the Athi plains to the south were a migration corridor for 20,000 wildebeest that migrated in and out of the park, like a mini version of Masai Mara. Today, there are about 200. The southern boundary is dotted with houses, farms, and rampant livestock. To the north is bustling Nairobi. Recently, a Chinese construction company was permitted to bisect the park with a skytrain. The wildlife can walk underneath the tracks, but the ecological footprint to build this structure was massive. 

Nairobi National Park is more of a co-management area than a true national park

Significant acreage of the park was plowed over to make it, while invasive plant species were introduced during the process. The whole project is a massive eyesore and insult to the tourism industry in Kenya. What are never discussed are the far-flung and devastating impacts of sand mining needed to build all that concrete. Many tourists continue to visit this great park but I fear its reputation has been really damaged. 

While the tourists keep coming and the political elite deem it acceptable for a few lions to continue to exist close to Nairobi, the park will continue to be a magical place well-worth visiting. 

Folks at the school clubhouse are always ready to lend a helping hand and when my friend Mik heard about our difficulty securing a vehicle, let us hire his Mitsubishi for the day. Our day started late because we were extremely tired, me from work and Ramata from travelling, but we managed to get into the park at a lazy 8am. 

We started at Nagolomon Dam near the park entrance, which had hippos and crocs and several waterbirds like the charismatic Black Crake, or the metallic Malachite Kingfisher. The sun was shining and it was a beautiful day to take pictures. Two White Rhinos seemed to appear out of nowhere right next to the road as I tried to maneuver the car for a photo. Ramata was in awe at these enormous beasts. We drove through some black cotton soil, hoping to see either White-tailed Lark or Somali Short-toed Lark but instead ended up with a Parasitic Weaver which was my only lifer of the day. 

Parasitic Weaver (lifer)

We made our way through the middle of the park, meandering our way toward the hippo pools on the far southeastern border. We encountered several game species which were not shy at all and allowed for nice views and photos. As my phone battery was super low, we abandoned the GPS navigation and followed the tracks wherever they would take us. We came upon a beautiful valley with yellowbark acacias and giraffes roaming around. An immature Martial Eagle was chilling near its nest while the parents were off hunting. 

Grassland Pipit

Dark Chanting Goshawk

Common Ostrich

Rufous-naped Lark

Martial Eagle

Secretary Bird

At the hippo pools, we did the walk with the ranger down the river, hoping to spot a Finfoot with the relatively high water levels. A solitary hippo played hide and seek with us while a crocodile basked on a sandbar. A few birds were about including Brimstone Canary, Yellow Bishop, Pale White-eye and White-backed Vultures in a nest. We drove to Hyeena Dam. There were 4 species of storks, a big crocodile, a hippo, and a small flock of Lesser Sandplovers, my first time seeing this species away from the coast. 

Lesser Sandplover

Marabou Storks

It was the heat of the day so found a bit of shade at the Mokoyeti Gorge viewpoint. We lied down in the shade and ate our lunch of boiled eggs, mangoes and chai (all the sustenance one needs on a safari, really). From there we made our way slowly back to the park gate, timing it so we would exit exactly at 6pm which was when the park closes. We heard a Shelley's Francolin calling from the bush, pulled over and tried to call it in but it was white aways off and I didn't have my speaker. Pursuit was not an option for obvious reasons. Would have to save one for the next time. Driving through the middle of the park,  we found 5 more White Rhinos at a watering hole, and a bunch of vultures lying on the ground. One of them was a Ruppel's Griffon Vulture, a good find. 

White Rhinos at the spa

Cattle Egret catching flies

Rupel's Griffon Vulture hiding amidst the ubiquitous White-backed Vultures

A guide told us he had seen two cheetahs somewhere far off in the park, and were were a bit jealous. It was getting toward 6pm so we had one more cruise past Nagolomon Dam. As we passed the dam toward the exit (it was about 6pm), a couple of cars ahead of us were looking at something. I scanned through the bushes and could spot a lion. We jostled for position among the growing car-jam and managed to snap a few pics of an adult female and two large cubs. Lots of vehicles trying to leave the park got incorporated into the jam and we were firmly boxed in for white a while. Some rangers came by and told everybody to dispers. The adult lion decided to walk up the road, with a cavalcade of vehicles trailing behind her. We opted to go the other direction to reach the exit. 

The real adventure was driving back. We should have made it back easily before dark via Kiambu road, but I missed the turnoff because I was in the wrong lane. I tried to get us off another exit via Thika Road but the highway bizarrely did a sort of U-turn, and led us back south. This was extremely frustrating knowing we were going further and further in the wrong direction as it got dark and the traffic got worse and worse. We ended up taking a circuitous route back through Nairobi before finally finding Kiambu Road (and almost missing the exit-again). Ramata has a Google map open but without any internet it lacked some crucial details. At last we could turn that off because I knew where I was going from that point. We got back to the house a little worse for wear but more importantly, without a scratch on Mik's car. 

All-in-all, a good day.