A trip to Muskegon Wastewater was in order.
Many are surprised to learn that birders spend considerable time at wastewater facilities, or as we call them, sewage lagoons. Yes, these are havens for migrating shorebirds and waterfowl (not because they love shit – but invertebrates), and naturally where you find birds you find birders.
Muskegon Wastewater, however, is no ordinary sewage lagoon. Let me attempt to give you a small feeling of the horrors we were about to experience.
A whiff of a billion well-digested meals wafted into the car and our unprepared nostrils, cloaking us in a stench that seemed inhuman. Our clothes would reek of sewage for a time if not permanently. If you were going to fart, now would be the time.
Green water lapped at the feces-caked shore, while a golden-plover hid amongst a gang of killdeer, rummaging in the invertebrate-rich algal sludge. In the main pond, Frisbee-sized patties floated on a stagnant, green film. Driving further into this evil place, we encountered an abomination: an entire section of lake cloaked in crap patties, with the odd tampon, that one could almost walk on, had they not been made of human feces.
But the worst atrocity was to follow: in the main pond, huge pumps blasted jets of sludge into the air, while the denizens of this hole made their daily living: a flock of northern Shovelers shoveling through the shit.
By that point, Alyson and I had lost our respect for birds. But we birded on, finding 17 Eared Grebes, 2 Lesser Black-backed Gulls and a Baird’s Sandpiper.
As we binged on honey-roasted peanuts, my likewise-scented toots thus far went un-noticed.
And that was the day we visited Muskegon Wastewater.
Bird on.
PS, we also saw Kevin Welsh for like 15 minutes in the Meijer parking lot: amazing! The first time we've been together since Camp Chiricahua in 2006!! We wish you a swift recovery from your mono Kevin and don't go smooching any more girls!
